Given my nonexistent dating life, yours turned to online dating and got on TinderTinder. After a few matches and awkward conversations, I found myself talking to a pretty girl; to protect her identity, let’s call her Shalini. It was my birthday the next day, and I was hosting a party for my friends; I asked Shalini if she wanted to join us, and she agreed. I still remember the moment she walked in; she was short, cute, and, most importantly, looked exactly like her pictures which, given my experience with dating apps, isn’t always the case. I introduced her to everyone, and she mingled with my friends well. There were many people at my party, so we didn’t get a chance to talk a lot, but she seemed to be having a good time. At some point during the night, I see her stepping out and talking to someone on the phone. I didn’t think much of it then, but she didn’t come back for another hour. I went out to ask her if everything was okay, and she said, ‘I’m just dealing with something, but I’ll be back soon. The party went on, and my friends decided to go to a club. As we are walking out, I see Shalini with another guy! someone I don’t recognize. He greets me, wishes me a happy birthday, and says he is a friend of Shalini. I found that very weird. Why would this girl invite another person to my party without asking me? I tell the guy we are headed to the club, and they are both welcome to join us, he agrees, and they both start walking with us. This entire time Shalini doesn’t say a word to me. She just has a straight face, almost like she is scared. At one point, we lost them since they were walking too slowly. Shalini called me and asked if I could wait for them to catch up, which I did. We get to the club, and as we go inside, this guy grabs Shalini and drags her back outside, and I see them getting into an argument. That’s when my friends and I figured something was off. We went out, and this guy yelled at her asking her to get in a cab. We got him to back off, and I brought Shalini back inside. She tells me this guy is her ex-boyfriend and has been harassing her. He had followed her to my party and threatened to make a scene if she didn’t go with him. She was on the phone with him trying to get him to leave her alone, but that didn’t work. I got the bouncer to ensure this ex-boyfriend couldn’t come in, and we went on with the party. Shalini stayed for a bit but went home, and the poor girl was probably traumatized by what happened. I figured this was the last I would see of her. Little did I know. The following day, I woke up to a text from Shalini. She says she had a good time last night and was sorry about the drama with her ex. I jokingly replied she could make it up to me by making breakfast for my friends. Some of them had crashed at my place. To my surprise, she says yes! 15 minutes later, she is at my home, and we are making pancakes for everyone and cracking jokes. That’s when I got a call from the building concierge, and there was someone in the lobby who claimed to be my friend and asked them to let me into my apartment. I look through the cameras, and it’s Shalini’s ex! I tell them to call the cops and don’t let this guy come upstairs. Minutes later, he calls Shalini and says he knows where she is and will kill himself if she doesn’t come down to see him. She hung up, and he started sending her videos of him cutting up his arms. The guy has gone completely psycho. By the time the cops arrive, he has left the building. I now have two police officers in my apartment taking everyone’s statement of what happened. When they are about to leave, I hear a knock on the door. I look through the lens and guess who, that’s right, a psycho ex-boyfriend with his cut-up’s arms is standing outside! I tell the officers, and they say, ‘let us open the door.’ As soon as they open the door, he sees the cops and freezes for a moment. Then he sees me standing behind the officer. He pulls out a knife from his pocket and runs right at me. Lucky for me the officer knocks his ass out right there and pins him onto the floor. Now he is on the floor with a bloody nose, two officers trying to restrain him. He is yelling, ‘Shalini, I love you! Talk about a Bollywood moment. The guy gets arrested and charged with attempted murder. I still have a restraining order against him to this day. Shalini and I went on a few dates after that, but things fizzled out, given the trauma of her ex-boyfriend trying to murder me. I haven’t been on TinderTinder since.
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