Mein samjhti rahi, “Maybe it is me. It may be the way I dress, I talk, I walk, I act. Obviously, why would people point fingers at me otherwise? I gave them the reason to. And hence, they had the rightful authority.” This is the mental toll every woman goes through daily. While it is a mere convenience to brush everything under the carpet of “Not All Men,” why do we not shift our narrative towards “But Every Woman!” The only memory of my seventh birthday was when a random biker inappropriately touched me while I was travelling ‘safely’ with my brother. I was 9 when my cousin grabbed my thigh and caressed it in the backseat of our car while my parents were sitting in the front. At age 11, I was blamed for provoking the 27-year-old neighbour for some potential ‘wrongdoings.’ I grew older, but the incidents only worsened. From strangers to my blood relations, I was a victim of their thirst. Anyway, “not all men.” You’d agree, right? Islamabad rape case incident. Sialkot rape case incidents and hundreds of unreported ones only shed light on one thing: every woman is unsafe. But why is it that we only get defensive when men are being called out for doings? “Tumhara baap, bhai bhi tu mard hai. Will you say the same about them?” I wish it were easier to understand that it is not about pointing fingers at brothers and fathers but about the mere fact that no woman knows whose brother or father would take them as a daughter or sister rather than as prey. Only if you could guarantee it, could you? When talking about their rights, safety and security, women do not mean they are anti-men. But the irony is, it is the men why women have to demand safety and security in the first place. So, all biases aside (if you still think there’s one), who’s to be blamed?
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