Monday has arrived. And most of you are probably trying your best to avoid spoilers for the latest Game of Thrones episode. Don’t worry, no spoilers here. The sad part about living in a different country from where the show airs means we usually have to wait a whole day to watch it. Most of us cannot stay up all night, find the right link and then watch it. Given that it’s Monday, most of us have either work or school to go to. Avoiding spoilers is not only becomes hard, it becomes near impossible.
Here at Propergaanda, we understand the importance of not spoiling a show. And as an online publication, all of our work is online. So we’ve had to master a way of avoiding spoilers while still existing. Here are a couple of our tricks to avoid getting your favorite show spoiled;
This may be impossible for some (like me), but avoid the internet at all costs. Even if you think you have been able to curate your newsfeed to avoid spoilers, you can never be too careful. Newsfeed curation is just an algorithm, and as a result, is not perfect. It may miss a few mentions, so it’s best to not even take the risk. Furthermore, there is always that one a@#hole who decides to ruin it for everyone. That one troll that thinks its “cool” that they’ve seen it before, and should ruin everyone’s experience. Don’t fall for it, run the other way. Just don’t do it.
Avoid everyone who watches the show. You have no idea who knows what, and who may accidently or purposely reveal something to you. Trolls exist in the real world too. Just do your work, or go to school, and avoid all social interactions. Even for people who don’t watch the show, be careful. Mutually-assured-destruction does not apply to them, so they can easily ruin the show without even caring. Moreover, they may not even plan to tell you anything. If someone knows what happened, their face usually gives it away. I’m at work right now, and I’m literally refusing to talk to my boss because she has seen it. I may get fired, but who cares?! I’ve waited 8 years for this, nothing is getting in my way.
If for some reason you work in at a place or go to school where spoilers are possible, just skip that day. You can always go back the next day. You have waited 8 YEARS for this. Just call in sick, or say you have a family emergency. And stay up all night, and watch it! Do not meet anyone, do not leave your room, just become a hermit until you have seen the episode. Take the pay cut, fail the exam. Trust me on this, it’s worth it.
Hear me out. You obviously know a limited amount of languages. It may be 1 or 2, maybe 3 if you’re really smart. But there is no way in hell you know all the languages in the world. So go to a place where you don’t speak the language. Go to China for a day, or maybe try traveling to a mountain range, far from civilization. You could even join a monastery! I highly doubt monks are allowed to watch television. Plus you may find inner peace and harmony; so bonus!
Now you may think that is pretty extreme, but it’s worth it. If anyone is about to ruin the show for you, and you have no way of escaping the situation, kill them. I’m serious! Look, even if you get caught, crimes of passion can get lower sentences. So your time in jail probably won’t be as long as the 8 years you’ve spent waiting for the end. Plus, if the person didn’t respect you enough to not spoil the show, he or she doesn’t really deserve to live. And I bet you most of society would take your side, so you’ll can at the very least gain a cult following and a place in pop culture. No one will ever forget the person who killed for a show. Why not be associated with your favorite show for all of time?